The Price of Intelligence

Hello Humans! It has been seemingly pointed out time and time again that intelligence in science and math comes at a great price. But it is a price that I am willing to pay. The price I am talking about is not hard work or lots of studying, but one that most don't think about when they think of scientists.

I just finished watching my favorite movie: The Imitation Game. A few people who saw it when it came out, all had the same reaction. "Why does it have to be about a gay guy?" They all asked. Why does the media keep having to put in that little jab to all of us? Well, they're missing the point. The movie was not about how Alan Turing was gay, but about how his life was lonely. He was made fun of during school, and his only friend ended up being someone who died very soon after. He later became a Math Professor, publishing amazing papers about many new and different topics, but was living all on his own. He then became apart of a team to break the Enigma, but worked for the most part all on his own. For the most part, Turing learned to cope with his loneliness, devoting his life and work to Science and Math, and pretending like his friend Christopher was still there.

Another example is one from a strange source, but lately I've been watching Doctor Who, yes I know, it's about the nerdiest show on the planet, but it really is amazing and expands your mind. One of the last episodes I watched had one of Earth's smartest kid in it. He had made a school and selected the smart people of the planet to come and essentially upgrade the school, which allowed them all to put their intelligence to use, and they were surrounded by others who understood them. In the end, all of the smart kids left Earth's smartest kid, and the Doctor stated, "It's hard to be intelligent. You learn to connect things that seem so simple, and then you wonder how no one else is able to see it."

I actually find myself doing both of these things, when I'm all alone during the day, studying Science and Math. I sit in the back of classrooms, not because I don't want to learn, but because that is where I can learn the best. When I was at home, I would always talk to my doggie, Riley. I would tell her things that I had learned of the stars and of the atoms. I find myself still "talking" to her, even when it's just inside my head, and even though she is an ocean and 2 states away from me. I find myself connecting things in class faster than others, such as factoring, derivatives, and resonance structures. Things just click faster in my brain than others.

In the movie, the Imitation Game, Turing, at the very beginning says a line that stabs me in the heart, because it's also how my brain works. "Are you paying attention? Good. If you're not listening carefully, you will miss things. Important things. I will not pause, I will not repeat myself, and you will not interrupt me. You think that because you're sitting where you are and I am sitting where I am that you are in control about what is about to happen. You are mistaken. I am in control, because I know things that you do not." One other thing that sparks my intrigue about Turing is when he tells his chief commander to fire everyone else, because he works better and faster alone, and that he will not have time to explain himself to the others as he is going. I totally relate to this, as my mind wanders very quickly from one thought to the next, and as I am doing my math or science work, it's very hard for me to explain what exactly it is that I am doing, even though I know exactly what it is that I am doing.

Now, why does this pertain to me? Well, the other day I was lucky enough to attend a BioChemistry Dinner, for BioChem majors at BYU-H. When I was telling the different professors what I wanted to do after I graduated, which was researching with possibly being a professor on the side, they all told me to go more towards the professor route. Why? I want to be in the lab primarily, helping to change the world! Not teaching people who are only taking the class to become a medical doctor one day and don't even care about the science behind it about science! But they told me this, that the scientists who go into researching tend to end up not married and lonely. Well, if that and the Doctor Who episode didn't sink it into my brain, then the Imitation Game sure did.

But why do scientists and mathematicians tend to be lonelier than others? From my personal experience, it's because they need someone who will either just listen, and possibly ask an intelligent question concerning that matter, or need someone else who understands the subject material on the same level as they do. One of my best friends from back at home, whenever I start to become silent, or start gazing off into space with my stern thinking face, they will ask me, "What's on your mind?" I love this, because then I get to explain why light is so cool, or how evolution makes total sense aligned with the gospel, or how calculus is really boring, and frankly too easy. It really shows that they care about me, and my love for Science. Now, while this price for intelligence of Math and Science is a big one, it's one that I will gladly pay to have my mind enlightened on the very things that make this world incredible. Stay wild, flower child.